What is up with this fatness?

My body is not changing the way I'd hoped. I'm still looking like dogshit and I'm fully aware of why this is so...My diet is the primary driver of my lack of results, this I know for certain. My diet has been attrocious. Completely ridiculous behavior, and I'm almost sick to write about it. Believe me, I have NO delusions about who I am or what I do or don't do. In fact, I'm as aware of my shortcomings as most, it seems to come with the territory when you develop self-awareness and consistently analyze your behavior.

Before I get too down on my patterns, I find it necessary to point out that I've been rocking....absolutely kicking ass with the other aspects of my life. Both gigs are flying in terms of sales year to date, profitability, and the sales pipelines are full to the brim. My financial picture is improving daily, and I'm closing in on being able to throw down the jack for my dream home...all great stuff...all a result of these Simple Disciplines that are highlighted in 90 Days to Discipline. So, good job Greg.

Now, it's time to kick my own ass a little bit...The first place to look, when you're not doing the things you know you should be doing, is your belief systems. If you're not taking action in one particular area of your life, it's usually a product of some belief that's at odds with the goal you're pursuing. Or, it could simply be the fact that your goals in this aspect are impotent and you're not getting enough leverage on yourself thinking about the reasons why you want to make these changes. In my case, I've set a goal of weighing 165 pounds and having 8% bodyfat. Something deep in my brain is either against that goal or is afraid of achieving it...for whatever reason. My challenge would be to uncover this negative, disempowering belief, and leverage a new, more empowering belief in its place. This isn't an easy task, by any means. Hell, millions of people spend hundreds of millions on shrinks every day in this country, attempting to dig into themselves and understand why they do what they do.

I'm inclined to believe my inaction is a product of having impotent goals. Well, maybe that's not the best way to characterize my struggle. The best way to phrase it is that mentally, the goal makes complete sense...yes, looking good at the pool or beach or whatever would be nice. But, I'm leaving it there. I'm not working myself into a lather over what it would really feel like to make this goal real. In my business and financial life, every day, twice per day, I go through a very vivid "as if" scenario in which I'm the guy I want to become in this realm -- I'm leading a couple of huge businesses, I'm speaking in front of huge audiences, I've authored successful books, I'm earning a great living. My house is huge and beautiful. I can actually picture myself sitting in my office, that's decked out in the most exquisite dark mahogany woodwork. I feel myself get into my ride and pull out of my four car garage and jump on the accelerator cruising down Airport Road in Bloomington, on my way to the office. Most importantly, I can actually FEEL WHAT IT'S LIKE TO BE THIS MAN. The man who's got the discipline, the focus, the skills, and the work ethic to build and manifest this level of success and abundance for my family. I can feel it...which is a cool thing, really. I look forward to this exercise, it's become one of my favority Simple Disciplines. Nerd Alert.

I'm just not doing that with my health and fitness goals. I throw it into my visions on occasion, but it's just not a priority. This may just be the wake up call I needed, in understanding just how critical the visualization process is, in building the visions we've created for ourselves. I'm on my way with the other aspects of my life...the biz and finance, the things goals, personal development, and contribution. And I can say with confidence the reason is because my emotions have evolved into a white hot obsession in these visualizations.

Now, I just need to focus more time, energy, and faith in this jacked up physique. I think I'll begin my vision with a scenario in which I arise early, before dawn and hit the gym. When I roll out of the rack, I can actually feel my abs contract and easily pull myself up out of bed...versus the circus act it is presently, when my gut makes me struggle to get up. I'll picture myself brushing my teeth before hitting the gym, and I look up in the mirror and see Brad Pitt's body from Fight Club with my dome on it. How about that? That's a pretty damn good motivator. Then I'll hit the trail for a quick 5 miler, flying on the trail, running at a 7 minute mile pace while feeling light and quick. Strength training after with a full-body workout, with an emphasis on explosive, crossfit type training. During this workout I'm strong, lean, and explosive.

Of course, I'm not lean, explosive or even very strong right now. But, this type of visualization tends to create awareness of what it'd feel like, look like, smell like to be, do, and have what I do in my vision. It propels us into taking massive action, because we can actually feel what looking like this would feel like. This is a hundred times more powerful than just sort of intellectually understanding what it would mean to be in better shape. That's weak as shit. And look where it's gotten me. Nowhere.

One other thing...I am going to work towards making the building of my body a passion of mine. This perspective is more positive than the way I've been viewing workouts and nutrition...as a necessary evil. If I can make have a more upbeat, positive inner dialogue about fitness and diet, I'll get much better results and I'll be more likely to view going to the gym as something I GET to do , versus something I HAVE to do. We'll try it. I'll keep you all updated

Do me this favor, though. Share your thoughts on this stuff. If you have something to add, please do so. If you want to call bullshit on something, call bullshit on it. I'd love for this to be a conversation. Could turn out to be a real fun thing...a bunch of people working hard to get better every day.

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